“You are not alone..”

I spent 1 year 2 months in the new working place – struggling, laughing, juggling, learning, and knowing tons of new things. And yes, I am finally back. I am literally back, back to write this post, back to the cheerful me, back to the person who appreciate her work so much, and yes, I am back to my previous job.


Did I have fun in the past 1 year 2 months like what I planned to have when I moved to that place? Yes, for sure I did have fun. I met a lot of new people, some inspiring, some annoying, some lovable, some hateful, and many kinds. It made me see the bigger and wider world and point of view. But, to admit it, it wasn’t really my place to be. A lot of people had questioned “Why are you leaving?”; a lot showed a huge surprise – especially when it is not a common practice for someone moving back to agency side. At some points, I were getting tired of answering “because”; but now I will proudly say “Why not?”.

People are sometimes blinded by the paradigm that something stated the best by society is the best as well. But we mostly forget that as an individual, best thing for you or to the world doesn’t mean it is the best thing for me. Best thing for me is getting back to this old but everlasting family of mine.


Of course, the journey of 1 year 2 month had changed me. It’s almost impossible to say I am the same person I was 1.5 years ago. I have adapted with the new environment, and it has changed me into a more individualist person. I don’t hate it but it doesn’t mean I like it that much as well. Being individualist means you have higher ego and arrogance, you somehow somewhat believed that you can only depend on yourself, you think that everybody else is worst than you. In a good way, being individualist mean you have a good confidence level, you are independent, you are able to make decisions. Both good and bad have intrudes my system. It intrudes in a way that I didn’t realize, I brought it up to my current state.

Second week after joining back on this work, my colleagues jokingly said that “Somebody get used to held her chins up”. He is a very good mentor of mine, and I got it immediately that he was reminding me that keeping the bad of being individualistic is not needed here. He mentioned that I was most-likely doing everything on my own, and trying my best to keep on standing on my own feet so hard. And he said, it is a good thing, but don’t forget, “you are not alone here”. Everybody is at everybody’s back. Yes, it made us look like a stalker who want to know everybody’s business, but when we are that close, it wasn’t a stalking at all. It just showed how much people care for you and they will always held you up once you fell down.


After spending 1.5 months, my friend’s statement has just getting truer. Since the day he mentioned “You are not alone”, I realize, I am NEVER alone until now; and I finally started to leave the worst of individualistic, leaving the best one instead.


To DO List

Hey ya there! I have been quite busy as a bee since the last post; suddenly I realized “Look! It’s all most the end of February already!”. Not much writing on this topic, just throwing up some point of view on to do list. πŸ™‚


I’ve wrote that I am actually a neat freak, this also happened for my work. I will always pile up everything in order, and I do find out that the to do list things help me the best. Once, I compared the way I work when I used to do list and when I don’t. Somehow, I am (probably) suggested that when I’ve wrote down what to do, I need to tick it. In order to tick it I have to do it, therefore, there are no works missed. But when I don’t do any to do list, I tend to forgetting what I am supposed to do.

Well, I got to admit that sometimes I am so lazy to make any to do list, but I forced myself to do so. Here’s some peek to my to-do-list at a post-it note:

… or in my binder page:


Anyway, have a good weekend! πŸ™‚


P.S. It really does give you a happy feeling when you are able to tick it one-by-one! πŸ˜‰

Too Much Compliments Kill

We’ve heard a lot said “too much never do you good”, well I cannot agree more. This time, I was drunk with too much compliments, which almost killed my sense.


A month has passed for the new journey here. Just before I moved, some of the directors in the previous company talked to me. Most of them talking about how good I am, and it would be a great loss for them if I moved to the new place. As previous, I was flattered, and still kept in mind that I need to be down to earth, because there are just lots of better people out there. Then I entered to the new work: first week was great, second through one month; I was like bumping here and there confused about what to do and how to do. In between, the new superior of mine talked to me that, she is expecting much from me. She has heard a lot of me, and (again) it is the good one. Of course, automatically, she set higher expectation with the standard already given there.

I talked to my friend, that I was scared that I might not go through that expectation, as I wasn’t that good. That compliments are just overrated. Enough saying, the truth is I became cocky; as other said, you’re saying “No, I wasn’t that good” just to make other compliment you more. Unconsciously, I was doing all those stupid things. HA! Bad habit of mine.


It comes today, suddenly, out of no where, I realized: I tried too hard to not be me; by trying to change my style in order to get to my superior’s expectation. And I realized (again out of no where), I have just to be me. That’s what they talked about previously about how good I am right? Perhaps, if somebody’s saying “Hey, you’re good”; I’ll try to answer thank you and humble instead. That way, I guess I will manage the compliments I received right? So, I won’t get cocky and fly to the moon without looking to the earth.


Well, I am lying, it doesn’t come out of no where, actually, today I talked to my best friends. One is the best mentor I’ve ever had, one is the irreplaceable friend I found in my first job. The funny things are we don’t talked about what kind of situation I had, what my work is, or what I am feeling right now. We are just talking nonsense, basic regular things as we talked in the past times. From talking my ex-colleagues, how to manage new fresh graduate, or even relationship stuff. In funny way, God gives me a sign that I am better when I am “normal”. And He gave me the talks to be normal with my friends.

After the talks with my friends, I realized, I DO need to follow the new company “rules”, I DO need to follow the way the new colleagues work, but I forgot that I am an unique individual as well. Who can have my own way if I think it is better than the current way, who can have my own decision to make, who is independent in both work and self. And I am really don’t need to think and assess the expectation too much. All I need to do is giving my best, despite of all expectation, be more proactive, and do the work with the best deliverable I can give. I guess that’s what’s all matter.


You see, it’s started from a simple compliments, by several people, in a consecutive days, and I am easily get cocky. I remembered one of my friend said, “You are a very arrogant, currently, in a good way. Because you’re proud of what you have, and what you are able to do. And with that arrogance you built a very high self-confidence. But beware, because the arrogance in a good way, is just an inch away from the bad one.” I was slipped, and getting to know that things are still the usual, I will try my hardest to crawl back to previous good one.

So, whenever there is too much, be always beware. Even if you beware, you can still get “killed”, but if you are brave enough to admit it, you will get through and survive.


Karawaci, November 30th, 2011.

Next Chapter’s Opening: First Week

Last week, I was all gloomy; who thought that a week passed by so fast? There is a quote saying that “every firsts are the hardest”. To think of that, it is true that parting ways with the “family” is hard; but learning new things is not hard. I would like to replace the word from “hard” into “interesting”.

On my previous trip to Bali, we went to Waterboom. Of course, there are a lot of tourists there: from adult, teens, kids, and even infants. In one of the ride’s queue, a cute little girl asked her dad: “Daddy, will it be scary?”, her father answered: “No, sweetheart, it will be FUN.” We practically smiled brightly for that father’s answer. It was her first time taking a quite extreme ride (well, we know that water park’s ride is usually a high slides) and her father had just change her mind set of seeing things.


I am using this method for the first week. I am not going to bluff out that I am not scared at all; to be honest, deep inside – it is really scary to have a new step. Especially when you are stepping it by your own. It has been a while that I feel secure inside a shell; I knew exactly the condition, the rules, and everything insides. But now, I really need to break the shell and moving on my own. BUT, I kept encouraging myself, the scary part could stay, as long as it is on the bottom rank of all feelings/moods I brought at the first day. That scary part cannot be removed, because it makes me human.

So, I stepped in, trying my best to show what I am capable of. And then, without me realizing, first day has finished, with quite a lot of introductions of the company basics. How’s the first day? Is it good? Let’s see, I went home without lacking on anything; ah, I survived the first day then :).


Then, second day came, in the morning, I was asked to join the meeting with my previous company (basically, my previous work place is the best market research company in Indonesia for retails; currently, my company is one of my previous company’s biggest clients). This is really interesting, to sit down in different side of point of view. I was forced to switch the view fast, from the agency side, to the client side. The level of challenge had just increased 1 points *getting excited*. At noon, it turns out there is another training on “Shopper Behavior”; as soon as the training finished, another few points – again – just added for the challenge’s level.

Somehow, third day has became the “welcoming day” for me, as suddenly, my help was needed as the previous handler was over loaded; and there was sudden request there. That day, was the first for me having lunch and working at the same time. No matter how busy I was, I was able to manage my lunch time, but that day, it was totally out of control. I am not proud of it, and obviously not making it as a habit. But, you know, it was urgent. When I got back home that day, I just realized that my eyes are really tired of looking those numbers. Funny thing was again, this is interesting.


Along this week, my colleague explained in a very great structured way (I respect her a lot of making this new things easier for me to learn) about every job’s routine that need to be done along the year. The more she talk, the more I am confused. The more I confused, the more I curious. The more I curious, the more I am getting excited. It’s like we are looking at the new toys, even though we have played with the small part of the toys, as the toys are bigger now, there are a lot of new parts to be played with. Here’s the reality, yes, I am getting more scared, with the thought of: “What if I cannot do it? What if I cannot perform?”, but again, I realized that others survived, which means I will be as well.

I just need to change my mind set to: “It will be FUN” πŸ™‚



Karawaci, 28 October 2011 on opening week of the next chapter in life.


Objective and Satisfaction

Yesterday, I crossed over my friend’s writing called “Sunday Thoughts – Complacency“. Somehow, his writing reminds me to keep on track with what I’ve decided when I moved to the new company. So, the writing started with him joining an event with Sandiaga Uno (one of the richest man in Indonesia according on Forbes Magazine) as the speaker. In that event, Sandiaga was talking about the middle class growth in Indonesia; Sandiaga then advising on the audience on how we grow and what should we do in this situation.


Here’s some of his writing:

…in Q&A session, an audience asked to Sandiaga what should Indonesian do differently to be able to compete with another country. Sandiaga said: we should not easily satisfied of ourselves. This satisfaction has caused Indonesian left behind by other country. Indonesian has lulled by the natural wealth and the potentials inside.Β 

Sandiaga’s answer remind me of what Sri Mulyani said in one of her interview. Sri Mulyani stated her opinion about how Indonesians are easily flattered and motivated; however, the motivation and/or the passion is not long-lasting. Again, satisfaction has been the root cause.

My lecturer once said, most of the time satisfaction has became the biggest obstacle in someone growth. This, usually, caused by no clear objective or target to be achieved.Β 

For example, when we are at school, we did have a clear objective: as accepted in national university. Then, we would do everything to get there. So is during university periods, we study hard to get high GPA in order to smoothening our career path in a good company.Β 

Unfortunately, as soon as we are graduated, most of us has lost the objective and target to be achieved.

Only few of us started working with clear objective for our careers. Most of the time, we let everything flow without our control. Unconsciously, we are infected by satisfaction…


Few paragraphs above from the writing reminds me that, I am used to be “in control” (read: had objectives and target) during my school and university years. I’ve to admit that, I am at my best when I know what exactly I wanted. It will be great if you can set the goal as clear as you can; it will be even better if you can put measurable goal. For example, losing weight, when you are stating how much you want to lose, you’ll be doing much much better.


I know this is sounds frightening as goal sounds so ahead in the future. With the world’s current dynamic, I prefer to set “present” goal. I was once confused, making decision on moving has pushed me to set the goal. Now, I have renewed my goal for then next 1-2 years, and it helped me to more focus and know what exactly I am going to do.

Some will ask, what will you do when the goal has been achieved? It’s simple, make another goal, because sky is no longer limit, there is no limit actually. As my friend’s writing, he put Steve Jobs quote: “Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish!”

The original writing is written by Ricky Tjok.

Copied paragraph has been permitted by him as well. Thank you. πŸ™‚

Farewell Note

The last day at Nielsen Indonesia has started, and here’s the farewell note:


Some may say picture speaks a lot of stories, I said words describe the best of everything; but now, both will never able to fully capture the story and describe the best.


Two years and 5 months are short. But each days had been a really great experience for me. I would like to say thank to each one of youΒ for making this short journey one of the best things I’ve ever had. As quoted from one of you: “Friends are sometimes parting ways”; I am departing now. We might have a different side of road now, but the scenery and scenes I’ve passed will never be forgotten; and one day (hopefully), we’ll find some intersection to meet.

Well, in my defense, I would say, “I won’t talk much in the farewell note here, as I don’t want you to be distracted from your work”; but the truth is I Β am wordless, as my words will never able to tell you how honored and grateful to have the opportunity of working with you. Therefore, until we meet again dearest friends, we are just few blocks apart! (Well, not that close, but you know, it’s quite close :)).


Thank YOU.

Warmest Regards,



Until we meet again dearest friends πŸ™‚


Karawaci, on the last day at the first company I joined after I was graduated.

I don’t know what I want, yet

These last few days, I did a LOT of talking with my superiors on the current company due to my resignation. A lot of views, a lot of questions, a lot of concerns, a lot of opinions, and of course, a lot of “WHYs?”

Among all things that was talked in those conversation, there is one most crucial question they’ve asked me: “Why are you resigning, and choose that new company to be your moving place? What do you want in your life?”


To all who asked, I explained:

Experience wouldn’t be the reason behind me moving out. Because, I believe that every company, every job, will guarantee you for more experience, but never guarantee you to have enough experience in one place. Some may say, you might want to have another 2 years here, by then you will have gained what you haven’t right now. Well, there is just no right time in the plan. Right time is coming suddenly, without any cautions; we realized it was a right time just after we had the “right time”. So, what’s my reason?

In short term, I want to learn to be closer to the decision maker, or even be the decision maker itself. This thing is something that my current company cannot give for me. Do I have any problems with my current company? No, everything are fine. Quoting from my dearest friend – when you have a problem, the problem should not be the reason of us running away, instead, we need to face the problem, finish it. As when there is a problem, there is a solution. This is simply, I want to increase the game and the risk. So far, I am making recommendations, but I never now what’s the true impact, by moving out, I will (step by step) be the one to be the decision maker itself.


Well, is that what I want in my life? To be the decision maker in this great dynamic industry? To be honest, I don’t know what I want yet in my life (in terms of long view). The decision of moving out is one of my way to find out what’s to be exactly what I want. It is really unfortunate that I am not included in the small percentage of those people who is able to know what they really want in their life earlier. Therefore, I am using this opportunity to create options for myself. Yes, some of you may say, too many options will confuse you, but if you don’t have any options, you won’t know the chances either. Everything always has its own pros and cons. This is up to ourselves, how to keep those options on count, and decide which one is the path.


The bigger piece of my life now is making the choice of resigning, and moving to the new company. I know exactly that most of the colleagues said that too bad for me making such decision, as I deserved better. But again, this is one life, one chance, and the most important, this is my life. For the good or bad decision I’ve made, I believe both are the best for me. When it’s bad, I get the learning, when it’s good, that it’s good.

This is my way, to make options, to have a choice, to decide what I really want in my life. I am grateful for those who concern, because they won’t concern if they don’t care. We’ll see, where the path really end, it could be the new path, or the current path, or even another path.


Karawaci, 30 September 2011 – a note to remind me in next few years, that I am on my way searching for the right path.