Time

Is Essential. One of the most essential thing for every living being in the world. It kept moving forward, never waiting whether you’re ready or not to move. It will always tick no matter you would prefer to have it paused.

I am a person who usually enjoy every ticking of the time, every moment given by the time. But recently, I started to blame my life condition on time. Why the time is not right? Why now? Why not later? Does time really help to solve a problem? Does time will really tell? Does time will really heal?

And then he said that problem is meant to be solved by ourselves. It is not supposed to be put aside and let time tell. The more you put it on hold, the heavier the problem will become.  He said again that time would be most probably the most evil thing in the world. It will never help to solve anything, instead it’s giving you more and more.

Something came up when he said that, and I remembered clearly the quotes in Alice: Looking Through the Glass movie – “Time is not a thief, Time is a gift. He gives before he takes.”. I told him that quotes, and we both smiles. We knew everything seemed to be unfair, seemed to be not in the right timing right now. We still don’t know what will be the solution; yet we agreed, that indeed Time is a gift.

If you remembered clearly, every single persons and living things in this world is given every second to act, to care, to love, to grow, to think, to breath, to move, to react, etc. The act that we choose to do in every ticking second is what Time gave us to shape our future, to shape our relationships, to shape our life. However, as nothing is forever, Time will eventually take. But long before he take, he give. We should celebrate Time, we should embrace Time, we should thank Time. We tend to remember clearly when he take, but do we remember the long journey when he give? There are a lot of things we could do and say, yet because we’re that selfish human, we let it go easily. We took Time for granted, and we blame him when it’s the moment he take it.

Don’t take Time for granted, don’t waste it. Time has been giving his love to us by giving first. Don’t let yourself get angry when it’s the moment Time demand back his take. When Time is taking back his share, smile as we know that we have utilized what he’s giving us in the best way we can. Whether we failed or succeed along the pathway, we should celebrate it when the Time is done. Because Time is a gift.

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F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Those funny letters creating one fruitful meaning in my world: Friends. I remembered back when I just started to begun my college years, I’ve decided to not start close relationship to any of the new person I met. In return, I got my best friends there. It’s baffling me that it has been 10 years this year that we’ve been friends.

And then, I go to work. Generally, you don’t get best friends at work, you get colleagues, leaders, bosses, etc. It’s funny how I ended working at this company where everybody seems to be another body’s best buddy. From working hour to weekends, everyone is doing it together. It might sounded like we live in a very small community, but no, we’re expanding. It is still the greatest feeling I have ever since.

From those I’ve met, hanged out with; I found this particular 2 persons, whose really “grabbing” me. I just can’t stop looking after/to them. For me, both of them are my super role-models.

One of them kept me on the ground with her sensible thought. I could be gone mad as hell, and she could just mention a sentence that totally make sense and I would suddenly calm down. We had our moment, in the past 6 years of friendship, we had that moment when perhaps we hate each other. We pissed of over simple things, like deciding where to eat, or where to go, or even her pissed of me for being to nuts over tidying up things. But we never stopped being friends, from eavesdropping next-table’s conversation in cafe, telling your secrets, being slouchy together and angry together.

If not because of her, I thought I could be not as sensible as I am today. I have this thrive to easily burned out and fired back whenever something tick me off. Because of her, I learned the most that you just have to take a deep breath, do the thinking first, and then act. It’s still not an easy thing for me, but I’d say, it’s a progress.

While the other, it’s quite magical on how a regular coffee moment every morning every day before we started working could turn us into the best buddies. He is a great person, a great leader with the most cynical attitude I’ve ever met. Yet, he is one of the smartest, the most logical, and surprisingly has quite some similar attitude and thinking with mine.

I learned from him that having an ambition as wide as the sea is good. I learned that baby step of doing the ambition need to be done, and those baby step will be always the hardest. I learned that even a baby step is a super hard work, I learned that when you fall down, you just have to get up and walk forward. Fix everything wrong, avoid to do the mistake second time, and do it again. Yes, he is cynical, but I’ll say he has even more positive attitude that the average person has.

In a way, these two persons have balanced out my personality in the past years. I wouldn’t trade them with anything else. So, for both of you, I send you with my biggest gratitude and love for always standing beside me. Annoyed me, taught me, cursed with me, built me and just being there as my best of best-est friends.

Love you to the moon and back!

Expectation and Hope

Here, where I live, I see a lot of young people get married in such a young age. Despite of living in this 21st century where you are not supposed to married very young, many people choose to do so. My few close friends for example, got married when she was just 22; or even some of the male friends, who are going to be married this year before he is 26! Well, I am not despising their decision; it’s their own life, and I expect/suppose that they know what they are doing. Divorce rates are to devastating, so yes, hopefully they made the decision with a clear head.

 

So, back to me, my same-aged-cousin, male, is going to married by next year. My other same-aged-relative, female, is getting married by this September. Here, male is not expected to be married in early ages, but female is expected to be married sooner. Both wedding plans have, to be honest, been killing me. Why? Because the aunties, the uncles are suddenly questioning, “When’s your turn?”; “Why don’t  you have any boyfriend?”; “You must stop working to much!”; etc. It was fine at first, and then get more annoying, and then sometimes, it bugged me. It bugged me in questions like: “Will I meet someone someday?”, “Will I settle down soon as well?”. 

Yes, it bugged me in a way, each time there are close male friends talking to me; I turned the conversation into some sorts of expectation. Some hope that there was something. Creating this imagination of what if, what if he got some intention to me? Will I just hop into the relationship? Or, maybe he’s just not really suit me. Because I would not tolerate his behavior in this part or that part. These crazy imaginations have came regularly. Actually, I just have those imagination just yesterday. 

Very stupid enough, I got these 2-3 male friends that sometimes (yes, it was just sometimes) chatted with me. I realized, I have let go one of them, and really think that he is truly just a friend, I don’t want to expect more. But then, there is this one, seems so understanding, joking around, seems nice. Of course, I was having the daydreaming, only to making fool of myself; because should he was sort of into you, it wouldn’t take that long to make a move. 

As usual, it always ends in only one way, I am slapping myself, back to the present time. Oh, that’s not real, you are just pretending. Your male friends, really, really think that you are his friend. That’s it. Nothing less, nothing more. He might enjoy talking to me, but that doesn’t mean that he is into me. I might be just a good friend to talk with. Yes, I am always back to reality with this thought. 

 

I came in a way thinking that I have to stop giving expectation, hoping, and imagining whatever could happened with my male friends here. I need to remind myself that whenever it going to happen, it will do. And actually, I am reminding myself right now. Being single is never bad, never, never bad. It is much better for being on my own instead of choosing wrong and ended up in increasing the divorce rate or every hard relationship time. 

 

Somewhere crossing the so-called-quarter-life-crisis. 

Ordinary People

Every problem will have its own solution. Maybe we really should have take it slower instead.

Girl im in love with you
This ain’t the honeymoon
Past the infatuation phase
Right in the thick of love
At times we get sick of love
It seems like we argue everyday

I know i misbehaved
And you made your mistakes
And we both still got room left to grow
And though love sometimes hurts
I still put you first
And we’ll make this thing work
But I think we should take it slow

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people
We don’t know which way to go
Cuz we’re ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow

This ain’t a movie no
No fairy tale conclusion ya’ll
It gets more confusing everyday
Sometimes it’s heaven sent
Then we head back to hell again
We kiss then we make up on the way

I hang up you call
We rise and we fall
And we feel like just walking away
As our love advances
We take second chances
Though it’s not a fantasy
I Still want you to stay

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people
We don’t know which way to go
Cuz we’re ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow

Take it slow
Maybe we’ll live and learn
Maybe we’ll crash and burn
Maybe you’ll stay, maybe you’ll leave,
maybe you’ll return
Maybe another fight
Maybe we won’t survive
But maybe we’ll grow
We never know baby youuuu and I

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people
We don’t know which way to go
Cuz we’re ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Heyyy)
We’re just ordinary people
We don’t know which way to go
Cuz we’re ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow

 

❤ ❤ ❤